George Carter
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| Monday 20th November, 2023

Had a few beers yesterday.

I knew I’d regret it. (I’ve had maybe four pints in the last six months – okay… seven now.)

But I did it with my ‘mindfulness’ head on, to figure out exactly why I was having them, what benefits they brought me and what downsides they had.

The downsides were clear – I really had a lot of trouble sleeping, had a horrible bitter taste in my mouth all night and woke up (after twelve low-quality hours in bed) feeling lethargic and hung over.

The upsides? Illusory, it seems.

I realised that I actually open up to my soon-to-be-ex wife when I’ve had a few drinks. (This time discussing how I watched Viktor Kee juggling [YouTube] on a recommendation from a friend and was so taken by his physique that I kinda forgot to watch the juggling.)

I realised from there that every time I’ve had something ‘important’ to discuss I’ve done so over beers. In fact, the whole relationship is essentially predicated on being at least slightly drunk. (The first time we saw each other naked and we weren’t drunk was really strange).

But I realise the ‘problem’ isn’t all mine. I have a great group of five friends now who I gladly open up to about all manner of things without the tiniest drop of alcohol. It’s because they are accepting and non-judgemental. They are uplifting, celebratory and supportive. Partly, I guess, because they have no skin in the game… I can be vulnerable to them and I am not ‘threatening our security’.

It’s very eye-opening though and something to watch carefully in future relationships.

To be fair, though, I drink almost nothing these days and all relationships since 2020 have been built on sober foundations.

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